So I had this super weird dream, approximately 2 nights ago. Instead of weird dream, I should have address it as a nightmare.

In the dream, it felt fucking real. Not even a second I doubt about the realistic of the dream.
I guess this is the thing about dream, we never doubt the dream that we are having is just a dream, despite how ridiculous it is. as if that we are brainless and can't interpret what's right and wrong in the dream.

Back to my super ridiculous nightmare. I have no idea how it started, but the part that have carved deeply in my ming even when am awake is the part where my younger brother, Wong Kai Jie is shot to dead by some random stranger that I don't even know. And I have totally no memory of why he is being shot.
All I did was crying nonstop since I know he's dead, all day, all night. It's like am crying everyday throughout the dream.
Of course my parents are there, and they cried their lungs out as well. But what's odd is that my youngest brother is nowhere to be seen in the dream. it's like he is not even part of the family.

Told my brother straight away when I got up saying I have dreamt about him and he is dead. And his reply was, "why me?". As if I should dreamed about the youngest brother being dead instead of him.

The thing about dream is that we get to forgot most of the details but only having very little memories of the part where it hits us the most. sometimes, the emotions even leak out from the dream.
I do experience laughing or crying out from the dream and also seeing people doing that as well. but this time, although I can feel the strong feeling and crying that much from the dream, it only happens in the dream instead of crying out from the dream.

Then I think, I need some help from the expert in order to explain what my dream is about. Coincidentally, am reading a book that explains what dreams represent mentally in reality.
Flipped to the page which matches my dream and it explains briefly that is is not really a terrible thing for me to dream of sibling died due to some kind of incident. instead, it stated that it is a  “吉” when am crying instead of feeling joy in the dream. of course it's just a book that briefly states the reason of having those nightmares and giving very little explanation as it would not fit the book if everything is stating out in the book.

So I kind of interpret the dream myself in order to explain the dream I had. In the dream, the younger brother is the main focus and the parents show up for a bit while my youngest brother is no where to be seen.

I kind of interpret is as, I get to see all of my youngest brother's updates through FB as he posts everything on his FB account. So I kind of feel that as if am living with him, knowing how he spends his time.
As for my parents, I still get to talk to them occasionally on the phone, and mostly chat through wechat. but my younger brother, it's been quite some time since we last talk which leads to this dream.

At least at the end of the dream before am awake, I managed to kill the fella who killed my brother. He killed my brother with a shotgun, and surprisingly he is killed with a shotgun as well.

Moral of the story? Don't fucking mess with my family.
signing off. XOXO

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